soleraessays.blogspot.com
Essays & Whatever: Teabagger's Computer Vocabulary
http://soleraessays.blogspot.com/2010/06/teabaggers-computer-vocabulary.html
Sunday, September 1, 2013. Backup - What you do when you run across a liberal in the woods. Bug – What you do to your Congressman at a town hall meeting. Byte - What your pit-bull did to your Barack Obama doll. Chip – The smart son who can load a magazine in 32 seconds. Terminal – Socialist Amtrak station. Crash - When you go to a Starbucks Coffee by mistake. Digital - Counting to nine on your fingers. Fax – Rush Limbaugh’s opinion. Hacker – Your wife after 26 years of smoking. Network – Fox News. Simple...
soleraessays.blogspot.com
Essays & Whatever: This Man And His Wife Tried Hiding Money From The FBI
http://soleraessays.blogspot.com/2015/06/this-man-and-his-wife-tried-hiding.html
Monday, June 15, 2015. This Man And His Wife Tried Hiding Money From The FBI. No one believes seniors.everyone thinks they are senile. An Elderly couple were celebrating their sixtieth anniversary. The couple had married as childhood sweethearts and had moved back to their old neighborhood after they retired. Holding hands they walked back to their old school. It was not locked, so they entered, and found the old desk they'd shared, where Andy had carved "I love you, Sally.". Sally said, "No.". About a M...
soleraessays.blogspot.com
Essays & Whatever: Playing for a homeless man
http://soleraessays.blogspot.com/2013/04/playing-for-homeless-man.html
Sunday, September 1, 2013. Playing for a homeless man. As a guitarist, I play many gigs. Recently I was asked by a funeral director to play at a graveside service for a homeless man. He had no family or friends, so the service was to be at a pauper’s cemetery in the backcountry. As I was not familiar with the backwoods, I got lost. As I opened the door to my car, I heard one of the workers say, “I never seen nothin’ like that before and I've been putting in septic tanks for twenty years.&...A young polic...
soleraessays.blogspot.com
Essays & Whatever: MY LAST TRIP TO COSTCO
http://soleraessays.blogspot.com/2011/08/my-last-trip-to-costco-hahaha.html
Saturday, August 17, 2013. MY LAST TRIP TO COSTCO. Yesterday I was at my local COSTCO buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Jake, the Wonder Dog and was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think I had an elephant? Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's ass and a car hit me. Costco won't let me shop there anymore. Better watch what you a...
soleraessays.blogspot.com
Essays & Whatever: Going slow???
http://soleraessays.blogspot.com/2013/08/going-slow.html
Friday, August 16, 2013. Sitting on the highway waiting to catch speeders, a state police officer saw a car puttering along at 22 M.P.H. He thinks to himself, that car is just as dangerous as a speeder. Approaching the car, he notices there are 5 old ladies, 2 in the front and 3 at the back, wide eyed and looking like ghosts. The driver obviously confused said,"Officer, I don't understand, I wasn't doing over the speed limit! What seems to be the problem? Before I go Ma'am, I have to ask, is everyone OK?
soleraessays.blogspot.com
Essays & Whatever: funny, but sad GED answers
http://soleraessays.blogspot.com/2011/09/funny-but-sad-ged-answers.html
Sunday, September 15, 2013. Funny, but sad GED answers. The following questions were set in last year's GED examination. These are genuine answers (from 16 year olds). Q Name the four seasons. A Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar. Q Explain one of the processes by which water can be made safe to drink. A Flirtation makes water safe to drink because it removes large pollutants like grit, sand, dead sheep and canoeists. Q How is dew formed. A The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire. Q How ...
soleraessays.blogspot.com
Essays & Whatever: a lame lawyer joke
http://soleraessays.blogspot.com/2012/05/lame-lawyer-joke.html
Sunday, September 1, 2013. A lame lawyer joke. Two lawyers are in a bank, when, suddenly, armed robbers burst in, waving guns and yelling for everyone to freeze. While several of the robbers take the money from the tellers, others line the customers, including the lawyers, up against a wall, and proceed to take their wallets, watches, and other valuables. The first lawyer replies, "It's the $100 I owe you.". More from Billie Rene. THIS IS A KEEPER! Dear Dr. Laura. MY LAST TRIP TO COSTCO.
soleraessays.blogspot.com
Essays & Whatever: Irish Humor for St Pat's
http://soleraessays.blogspot.com/2014/03/irish-humor-for-st-pats_16.html
Sunday, March 16, 2014. Irish Humor for St Pat's. John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said,. Here's to spending the rest of me life, between the legs of me wife! That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night! He went home and told his wife, Mary, "I won the prize for the Best toast of the night". She said, "Aye, did ye now. And what was your toast? John said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church beside me wife.". Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!
soleraessays.blogspot.com
Essays & Whatever: A young police officer testifies
http://soleraessays.blogspot.com/2013/09/a-young-police-officer-testifies.html
Wednesday, September 25, 2013. A young police officer testifies. If you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have been as sharp as this policeman. He was being cross-examined by a defense attorney during a felony trial. The lawyer was trying to undermine the police officer's credibility . Q: 'Officer - - did you see my client fleeing the scene? A: 'No sir. But I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender, running several blocks away.'. Q: 'With your life? A young p...
